Tuesday 27 January 2015

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHA.............@.AKPORS

A newlywed couple AKPORS on their honeymoon prepares to see each other naked for the first time.
AKPORS the husband exposes his knotted and twisted feet. He explains, "I had tolio as a child."
The wife asks if he means polio. He says, "No, it only affects the toes."
He removes his pants and reveals deformed knees. He admits, "I had kneesles, too."
Finally, he pulls off his boxers. In shock, the woman gasps, "Oh no -- smallcox, too!"

PROFESSOR AKPORS AND MADAN AKPORS..................

AKPORS the  math professor and his wife are both 60 years old. One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband AKPORS, that says, "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don't bother waiting up for me."
AKPORS returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you're not giving me. So I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I'm sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don't you wait up for me."

LOL..........................AKPORS AND THE BROTHER IN LAW

Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.
Soon everyone was gone except for AKPORS who sat calmly.
Satan walked up to him and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
AKPORS replied, "Yep, sure do."
Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said theAKPORS
Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
AKPORS replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."

LOL............................................AKPORS IN HOSP[ITAL SH***

AKPORS  was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're beautiful!" and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side.
A couple of minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said, "You're cute!" Well, the wife was dissapointed because instead of "beautiful," it was "cute." She asked, "What happened to 'beautiful'?" His reply was "The drugs are wearing off!"

oh my gadddddddddddddddddd...........lol

A police officer pulls over a AKPORS the driver and informs him that he has just won #5,000 in a safety competition, all because he is wearing his seat belt.

"What are you going to do with the prize money?" the officer asks.
AKPORS responds, "I guess I'll go to driving school and get my license."

His wife says, "Officer, don't listen to him. He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."

The guy in the back seat pops up out from under the blanket and says, "I knew we wouldn't get far in this stolen car."

Just then a knock comes from the trunk and a voice calls out, "Are we over the border yet?"

akpors and the RED DEVIL.........LOL


Three OF WHICH Akpors was one of the  guys die and go to Hell.

Satan asks the first guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?"

"He was a candle maker and seller." So, Satan burns off the guy's d**k.

Satan asks the second guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?"

"He was a rope maker." So, Satan rips off the guy's d**k with a rope.

Satan asks the third guy (AKPORS), "What was your daddy when you were alive?"
AKPORS  smiles and says, "He made donuts and lollipops."

Thursday 8 January 2015

THE MAN IS AT IT AGAIN........................LOL

A COUPLE NAME MR AND MRS  AKPORS  RECEIVED A LETTER FROM THEIR DAUGHTER  WHO WENT TO STUDY MODERN PHYSICS OVERSEAS, THE LETTER READ;

                  '' MY BELOVED PARENTS, I MISS U SO MUCH  AND IT  BREAKS MY HEART TO THINK THAT BY THE TIME  I GET BACK U 'LL BE TOO OLD.
SO ENCLOSE YOU ''LL  FIND A BOTTLE OF  POTION I HAVE INVENTED. IT WILL MAKE U YOUNG ,SO WHEN I  RETURN YOU 'LL BE THE  SAME AGE AS I LEFT U.

    NOTE: PLEASE TAKE  ONLY A DROP, SO THEY OPENED THE ENVELOPE AND IN IT THERE IS A BOTTLE WITH  A RED POTION.
      AKPORS LOOKED AT HIS WIFE AND SAYS:
                     
''  YOU GO FIRST".
      SO THE  WIFE  TAKES A DROP THEREAFTER. THEN AKPORS FOLLOWS.
INDEED AKPORS WIFE TURN  FIVE YEARS YOUNGER.
YEARS LATER THE DAUGHTER OF AKPORS RETURN HOME TO FIND HER MOTHER  YOUNG AND PRETTY  CARRYING  A BABY  ON HER BACK.
  THE MOTHER PROCEEDS TO  TELL HER DAUGHTER HOW  THE POTION WORKED AND MADE HER LOOK YOUNG.
      THE DAUGHTER WAS DELIGHTED AND ASKED  AFTER HER DAD-
MOTHER: YOUR  HUSBAND?
HMMMM.MY CHILD, YOUR FATHER AKPORS WAS SO JEALOUS THAT I WAS SO YOUNG HE  DRANK THE WHOLE BOTTLE.
DAUGHTER: WHAT ?
SO WHERE  HIS HE?
MOTHER: HAHAHAHAHHHHAAAAAA, WHO DO U THINK IS  THE BABY ON MY BACK???